Lauren's surgery went well yesterday. She now has three titanium plates holding together the ribs on her left side. They also put in a suction tube to help clean out the fluids from her lungs replacing the tubes that once helped to keep air out of them.
Today they begin to ween Lauren off of the respirator. Our hope is that she does well enough that she is able to be completely breathe on her own and awake by the end of the week.
I realized that it may seem selfish of us to want her awake. At least being awake she can truly communicate with us--about her weak right arm, about whether or not she can see out of that right eye that is still dilated but now responding at last. But really it's just to be able to ask her if she is okay, to tell her we love you and around the world we put out the distress signal and people are praying for you, thinking of you and waiting for the day when we can say you are better.
Awake also means progress it means that she is that much closer to being herself to seeing her children, to coming home and being the process of getting back to her regular life.
Awake also means alot of pain. The nurse warned us that at first she may freak out. while she is semi-conscience and can hear and respond to us until she is completely awake she will not understand what has happened to her. Then the pain will set in. The pain from her ribs, from the mere act of breathing will be unbelievable.
So we will take things one day at a time. We need to focus on what today will bring and remain hopeful about tomorrow. And thank every higher power that she is here with us and will be for a very long time.
With love and gratitude,
us.
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